Tomorrow is my first day back to work after my
vacation. I’m not dreading it. I’m dreading a few items on the agenda, but
not the actual going back to work.
That’s always a good sign that taking a vacation worked.
I could tell that I needed a vacation…well…a few months ago. But after I woke up roaring, that was a definite sign.
I was feeling a little worn thin. Feeling like I was responsible for it all-this huge burden of the world.
Sigh.
We do this thing in the social work field called “supervision.” Sure, it’s meeting with the boss to talk about projects and goals, etc. but it is also an opportunity to process what we have seen and heard. A way to get out some of this trauma. I talked to my boss about it. This fixer feeling. I said that it felt like I was responsible for fixing everyone.
That’s a bit presumptuous, isn’t it? That I should fix someone or that they need to be fixed. That I am so perfect that I can just swoop in someone’s life and make their life perfect too. Because I have all the answers. Ahem. No, not really.
Vacation gives you the gift of perspective. The reminder that there is more to life than work. But for me, it was more of a reminder that life isn’t all tragedy and pain. There is joy. And I see it every day, but doing the work that I do, sometimes I lose sight of that.
This is what my dad had to say about it, the day after I posted all about my struggles with finding that perspective:
I can only say you cannot do everything for everyone. You have to let go and they have to generate an angel of hope for themselves. Enjoy your life with your family.
He’s right. I’m no one’s savior. I’m just trying to be a helper, not a fixer.
And I need to look for the joy with my family, with my life.
Thanks for the reminder, Dad.
I could tell that I needed a vacation…well…a few months ago. But after I woke up roaring, that was a definite sign.
I was feeling a little worn thin. Feeling like I was responsible for it all-this huge burden of the world.
Sigh.
We do this thing in the social work field called “supervision.” Sure, it’s meeting with the boss to talk about projects and goals, etc. but it is also an opportunity to process what we have seen and heard. A way to get out some of this trauma. I talked to my boss about it. This fixer feeling. I said that it felt like I was responsible for fixing everyone.
That’s a bit presumptuous, isn’t it? That I should fix someone or that they need to be fixed. That I am so perfect that I can just swoop in someone’s life and make their life perfect too. Because I have all the answers. Ahem. No, not really.
Vacation gives you the gift of perspective. The reminder that there is more to life than work. But for me, it was more of a reminder that life isn’t all tragedy and pain. There is joy. And I see it every day, but doing the work that I do, sometimes I lose sight of that.
This is what my dad had to say about it, the day after I posted all about my struggles with finding that perspective:
I can only say you cannot do everything for everyone. You have to let go and they have to generate an angel of hope for themselves. Enjoy your life with your family.
He’s right. I’m no one’s savior. I’m just trying to be a helper, not a fixer.
And I need to look for the joy with my family, with my life.
Thanks for the reminder, Dad.
Dads are smart like that.
ReplyDeleteThis is so true. I work with kids who seem 'unfixable' (and its true, nothing will 'fix' them) So i get frustrated about this program that is based on ideals and is supposed to help them, but is it really helping them, i'm not so sure. I guess in a perfect world, it would work. they would get better and make huge strides and change. But its not a perfect world. I try to have perspective but it is hard during my 3 hour shifts that feel like 10 hours! I keep at it. I try to love them the best way I know how and in a way they can relate to. Its tough work.
ReplyDeleteThis is a great reminder Kat thanks for sharing!
Sometimes the best we can do is simply be there for someone. I realize that goes against every "social worky" instinct to fix someone. :)
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