Quiet Time

I haven’t been sleeping well lately.  And this isn’t meant to be said as a complaint, more as a statement of fact.

I get so tired around 8:30-9 pm that I run into bed.  I have mentioned before that I turned into my dad and go to bed super early, haven’t I? 

The problem is that I wake up around 2-3 am, and my brain turns on.  After about 1-2 hours of overthinking every situation I encountered the previous day, I fall asleep again for another hour before the alarm goes off.

For a while, I thought it was Girl Scout cookies.  Not eating them, but dealing with selling them.  I read a post today that changed my perspective a bit.  I realized that my sleep difficulty is part of a larger issue of feeling frantic.  And selling the cookies was part of feeling frantic.

To me, feeling frantic means feeling consumed by life.  This is about the to-dos and other obligations.  This is about trying to make time for my family and myself.

This is about not having enough quiet.

I need lots of down time, remember?  I am like a small child.

When I’m on my run to bed every night, I give the blog a fleeting thought.  I should write a post.  But I’m too tired.  I think not creating that down time with writing is wreaking a little havoc.  Writing gives my brain a little time to unwind and shut down.  Quiet those 2 am thoughts.

I haven’t been making enough time for quiet.

And I feel frantic.  I forget things, I procrastinate, I rush.

Those quiet moments throughout the day, those moments that we aren’t filling with to-dos, obligations or technology, those keep us centered.  Those moments help me to refocus so I don’t feel frantic.  I am then able to really focus on my priorities.

Today was a short day for me at work.  Since I have been home, I have had to quiet several to-dos.  I need time to simply be.  So I sit at the computer, wrapped up in a blanket and put my words down.  I hope that those thoughts finally leave my head and allow for some quiet.